Introduction: The Masks We Wear
Life often teaches us to wear "masks"-to present versions of ourselves that protect us, help us fit in, or navigate spaces where our full selves might not feel welcome. For many Black women, these masks serve as shields, helping us survive systems that weren't built to support us. However, wearing these masks over time can lead to disconnection from our authentic selves and a feeling of invisibility.
In Kumwe Circle, the theme of "Taking the Mask Off" creates a safe space to explore what it means to release these protective layers. It's an invitation to reclaim our true selves, grounded in a community that honors each person's pace and safety.
The Layers of Masking and the Role of Code-Switching
Masking and code-switching are closely intertwined. Code-switching-the act of adjusting one's speech, behavior, or appearance to align with dominant cultural norms-is often a form of masking. For Black women, this can mean suppressing parts of our identity in professional or social settings to avoid judgment or marginalization. While sometimes necessary, this can come at the expense of authenticity and well-being.
Studies show that code-switching can lead to exhaustion, identity fragmentation, and stress, especially when it becomes a daily habit (McCluney et al., 2019). In Kumwe, we reflect on these realities and explore reconnecting with our authentic selves.
Unmasking in Kumwe: A Journey of Vulnerability
In Kumwe, unmasking is a personal and collective process of questioning the parts of ourselves we've hidden. Importantly, we recognize that unmasking isn't always safe or possible in every situation. As Brene Brown says, "Vulnerability sounds like truth and feels like courage. Truth and courage aren't always comfortable, but they're never weakness" (Brown, 2012). Kumwe values vulnerability as a strength, creating a space where shedding layers becomes a pathway to self-discovery and healing.
How Vulnerability Heals
Vulnerability allows room for honesty and connection in safe spaces. Research shows that vulnerability fosters empathy, strengthens relationships, and promotes healing (Brown, 2015). In Kumwe, vulnerability is both personal and collective. Members sharing their stories often discover that they aren't alone, fostering a sense of belonging and trust in the community.
Tools for Unmasking in Kumwe Circle
In Kumwe, unmasking is a journey. We provide practices that support each member's unique path:
- Self-Reflection Exercises: Journaling prompts, like "What would change if my desired transformation occurred?" help members explore inner landscapes and identify their masks.
- Storying and Restorying: Participants examine personal narratives, reshaping them to reflect true selves. This acknowledges experiences and resilience that shape identity.
- Sharing Circles: In smaller circles, members discuss experiences with masking and code-switching, finding strength in shared stories.
- Mindfulness Practices: Mindfulness exercises encourage members to observe thoughts without judgment, building awareness and self-compassion.
Living Authentically and Navigating the World
Living authentically doesn't mean rejecting all masks-it means consciously choosing when and where we show up fully as ourselves. For some, unmasking might involve setting boundaries or embracing cultural expressions previously suppressed.
In Kumwe, we support each participant in discovering what authenticity looks like. Over time, this approach brings ease, confidence, and alignment, making the journey of living authentically a fulfilling experience.
Conclusion: Rediscovering Our True Selves
"Taking the Mask Off" is about rediscovering who we are beneath our protective layers. In Kumwe, unmasking is a process of honoring personal stories, finding safe spaces to express truths, and choosing when to share them.
As we unmask, we reclaim our full selves. Vulnerability connects us deeply with others, and authenticity opens doors to a more aligned way of being. In Kumwe, we embark on this journey together, knowing that growth is stronger when shared.
Lisa Ndejuru
